Death.

People die everyday. Yes, sometimes its your loved one. It is really hard to accept the fact that they just had gone to a better place. The pain is.. cannot be put into words. Buts its nature, its the cycle of life. You have to simply accept the fact and let go. Personally, I had my own experience when your loved one is snatched away. Twice at once. I am writing this not to make people look at me with different perspective but I wrote this to show people that i had over come this. It was a long process, if i did it so can everyone of you. My grandmother had been suffering for cancer for years. She kept it to herself until there was an outbreak. Suddenly things were different. There was an outbreak. And suddenly, days at home eating her home cooked meal had turned into daily trips to the hospital. She was strong, she held on and will try to be the same. There were times when she will not receive any medications because it makes her feel weak. She will be moaning in pain. She would scream at me when i gave her pain killers saying I am doing this to shut her up. I know how badly she wants to see her orchid and there were times when she admitted she see things floating above her trying to take her away. It was hard. All my cousins and I could do is just bring the joy into her room. My cousins and i were still young. We would sing and changed the song that she sang to us when we were kid into rap and you name it. She would smile and it is priceless because she spend most of the days knocked out by the drugs. We wanted to put her to sleep but she would not go through this without a fight. She hang on. There were times when the she start gasping for air and suddenly there was nothing. We thought we had loose her as she had stopped breathing. Suddenly she sprung back to life when we were crying and demand for a drumstick. She would than demand everyone to gather around her bed and start scolding each and everyone of us. She was nearly back to normal. But deep down i know she had came back because she was worry about us. Especially her grandchild. As if the God had not taken enough away from me, my grandfather was struck by cancer. Lung cancer. Nobody told him because we knew he was nothing like my grandmother. He will give up in life. My mum being a super woman rush to two houses to look after them and she, taking over my grandmother's gene was strong. She did not give her time to moan. I was in school, having lessons as usual when suddenly my mum appear at my doorsteps with my brother beside her.I knew something was wrong. I was chilling because i thought it was a false alarm, it had to be, it happened for a few times. When suddenly my mum burst out crying. She accepted a call and kept saying hold on under her breathe. I held my brother tight secretly hoping she would let go to free herself from the pain. All of us were not there on time. My dad was sitting beside her at all times. The moment when he walked out and came back in lesser than 5 minutes time, she was gone. My mum rushed in and she being a strong woman still put on a poker face and arranged the funeral. She joked around but i knew she need her moment to cry. I was putting on my best poker face too, hugging my cousin sisters who was also too late to see the last of her. But as strong as my mum and i were, we broke down and cry alas, when everything was almost over. The next morning, my dad went to check on my grandfather. He sat there in the sofa. My dad called him for breakfast but he sat there silently. That is when my dad knew, he was gone too. It was unexpected, he was suppose to have a few more months left. Than everything went on. I was too numb to cry. How did I face it? By simply accepting that they are in a better place now. That one day I will reunite with them. That they are not dead because they will always be in my heart. I choose to remember the great times we had. Not the trips to the hospital and watching the drug taking them away. It was not easy but it worked. Now, my family can talk about them without holding back. My mum still held on to the necklace my grandma gave her. Believe in God, tell yourself that they are at a better place now free from sufferings. Tell yourself that they are waiting for you when the time comes. Don't be afraid of death because it will come anyway. Spend the most out of your life. Do your best, at least you will die knowing that I had made the best out of my life.

Believe in God. God is Just and everything happens for a reason.